3 Acts of Self Accountability
In all that I share with you all, the ultimate goal is to heal. Self accountability has been a big theme in my life because it has played a critical part in my healing by allowing me to open my heart to experience life's happenings. Self accountability has taken me from the role of victim to witness, and make sure that I am not spreading poison. We often avoid it because it requires reflection, which requires pure honesty. So, here are my top three, simple acts of self accountability. Enjoy.
A habit I have adopted before I say something is to ask if it is true, necessary, and kind. Answering this question puts me in check by making sure I'm not speaking out spite, fear, anger, or trauma. Use your words to speak power into yourself and what is happening around you. Often times, we could make matters worse by providing thoughts that aren't conducive the situation at hand. Be mindful.
When I feel angsty or angry, I get excited because that means my ego has been triggered. My ego being triggered means the Universe is giving me an opportunity to dig deep and get to the root of childhood trauma, wounds from toxic relationships, or self neglect. So, when I feel myself welling up, I take a few deep breaths and either talk it out with the person I am in the moment with (trust plays a key factor), or I excuse myself in order to comfortably dig into myself.
In law school, we have to brief tons of cases. A major part of the brief is to state the facts of the case before jumping into the legal analysis. This skill has impacted my life as a whole. Often times, we act off impulse and emotions, but it's a horrible feeling when you calm down and realize you: a. overreacted or b. didn't say what you needed to say because of your rage or emotional overload. It is okay to not respond immediately. Get a journal and write down the facts...not how you feel or what you think, but the cold, hard facts. Seeing what is REALLY happening on paper will allow you to respond rationally and enforce a strong sense of self preservation. You can handle your Self in a way that makes a lasting impact on your healing, and possibly leave the world with something to think about.
Though this post is short, these three tips have made a huge impact on how I talk to others, as well as myself. Holding yourself accountable is not negating the depth of your experiences or being hard on yourself. It is a thorough act of self communication to make sure you are living life through a clean filter. Don't be afraid of what you may find in your chest of dirt, there are gems there.
The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself is a GREAT book that speaks on the power of reflecting and self accountability. Check it out.
I love you all,
Chasity aka A Natural Beaut <3